Last night on the Big Brother Feeds we met a new Houseguest: Victoria. Yeah I know, I hadn’t heard of her before either, but turns out she’s been in there the whole time! But settle in because Victoria made her debut in grand fashion with story time that’s worth a watch.

Victoria Rafaeli snatched as a baby

Victoria Rafaeli snatched by a “Crow” – Source: CBS

Flashback to 1:00AM BBT 7/15 on Cameras 1/2 as Victoria tells Zach, Nicole, Jocasta, Christine, and Frankie about this totally true thing that never possibly happened to her.

Back when Victoria was two and at a beach with her mother in Israel there was an incident with a “black bird.” She’s not sure what kind of bird is black, but after a few suggestions from the crowd they first settle on a crow.

So this “crow” swooped down at the beach, hooked its talons in to her shoulders, and carried her away. Thankfully her mother was there to stop this monstrous beast from succeeding in its goal or we might not even know her today.

Everyone in the room is roaring with laughter as Victoria defends herself saying this is a true story and explains why she is now terrified of birds as a result.

When they explain a crow is about the size of a dove Victoria says, “I don’t know what a dove is.” Oh my. Victoria swears her mom told her it was a crow, but is willing to adjust her story to it possibly being a hawk. No, she’s pretty sure it was a crow, a huge crow, a “scarecrow.” Zach tries to explain what a scarecrow is, but I don’t think it’ll take.

Soon Jocasta is moving around the room carrying a shoe and hovering over Christine telling her “you gotta get your baby! You gotta get your baby!” Jocasta asks Victoria if she was “the world’s smallest two year old ever known?” Considering two year old children typically weigh over 25 lb and a crow weighs about 1 lb it’s obvious that Victoria is way off, but she’s not going to believe that.

“No, I’m telling you, really,” protests Victoria. She’s adamant that this magical tale of crow-child-thievery took place. You’ll have to watch it all for yourself to really enjoy this on the Live Feeds.

Oh the fun didn’t end there with Victoria’s stories either. Another time she fell down rollerblading and sued her city because the pavement should have been smoother. She pocketed a cool $6,000 of taxpayer cash for that one and went on vacation with it. You’re welcome, America!

Zach asks if she has any more “amazing stories like that?” Sadly she’s all out. Victoria, everyone.