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Big Brother 13 Fortune Teller Predictions

Big Brother finally woke up Crystal the Fortune Teller last night on the Live Feeds. As part of the next Head of Household competition the HGs will be presented with “fortunes” to remember. Presumably, the HG who gets the most “True/False” questions correct regarding what Crystal said will become the next HoH.

Crystal has been waking the HGs up throughout the night so they’re sure to be well rested ahead of the next comp. Turn on your Live Feeds and listen in as the HGs do their best to remember each fortune. Don’t have the Feeds yet? There’s still time to get the Free Trial and see what other fans have been watching all season.

Big Brother Live Feed Flashback time:
September 5, 2011 @ 9:38 PM BBT Cams 1/2
September 5, 2011 @ 9:43 PM BBT Cams 1/2
September 5, 2011 @ 9:48 PM BBT Cams 1/2
September 5, 2011 @ 9:57 PM BBT Cams 1/2
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Flashback to Monday at 9:38PM BBT to see Crystal the Fortune Teller introduce herself and the game to the HGs. Her first fortune arrives at 9:43PM BBT:

In 2018, Shelly will make millions when her book, “How I created the perfect tan and how you tan too,” reaches number 3 on the all-time best seller list.”

Crystal returns at 9:48PM BBT with a prediction for Porsche:

In 2017, after the hot Miami sun becomes too much for her to bear, Porsche will move to Anchorage, Alaska and buy an igloo with an Eskimo named Ernie.

Another fortune arrives at 9:57PM BBT. This time Jeff gets a zinger of his own.

In 2014, Jeff will disappear from society. He will be last seen wander the Chicago streets muttering only two words: clown shoe.

With lots more predictions to go the Fortune Teller starts to speed up:

Big Brother Live Feed Flashback time:
September 5, 2011 @ 10:23 PM BBT Cams 1/2
September 5, 2011 @ 10:25 PM BBT Cams 1/2
September 5, 2011 @ 10:41 PM BBT Cams 1/2
September 5, 2011 @ 10:44 PM BBT Cams 1/2
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Crystal takes a swipe at Evel Dick and Daniele Donato at 10:23PM BBT.

On October 15th, 2011 at 3:42PM, Daniele will reconcile with her father Dick. On October 15th 2011 at 3:49PM, they will go back to not speaking.

After a very short break, Crystal returns with a zinger for Kalia at 10:25PM BBT.

In 2014, after sleeping for 19 straight days and making national headlines in a sleep study, Kalia will earn her dream job as a mattress and pillow tester.

At 10:41PM BBT it’s finally time for Lawon to handsomefy these fortunes with one of his own.

In 2016 Lawon will take New York Fashion Week by storm when he launches his Handsomefied line of hats, ties, and jackets.

No rest for the weary. Crystal returns at 10:44PM BBT with a fortune for Brendon.

After taking 9 years to earn his PhD, Brendon will shock physicians and scholars alike after discovering a cure for an ailment that plagued him his entire life: Athlete’s Foot.

Ehh, not one of its best, but that won’t stop it now.

Big Brother Live Feed Flashback time:
September 5, 2011 @ 10:55 PM BBT Cams 1/2
September 5, 2011 @ 11:03 PM BBT Cams 1/2
September 5, 2011 @ 11:04 PM BBT Cams 1/2
September 5, 2011 @ 11:06 PM BBT Cams 1/2
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It’s Adam’s turn at Crystal’s fortune telling at 10:55PM BBT.

In 2020, Adam will file for bankruptcy after investing his life savings into a line of bacon-scented, heavy metal teddy bears for children.

Next, Crystal has mankind’s most feared prediction at 11:03PM BBT: Rachel’s baby!

In 2018, Rachel will give birth to a 9lb 6oz bouncing baby boy, naming it Bookie Jr. after its proud father.

Not even the Hoff is safe from these fortunes when he’s paired up with Cassi at 11:06PM BBT.

In 2012, Cassi will land a role alongside international megastar, David Hasselhoff, in the countrified Baywatch reboot, Riverwatch.

Okay, those were a little better, but still more to go.

Big Brother Live Feed Flashback time:
September 5, 2011 @ 11:08 PM BBT Cams 1/2
September 5, 2011 @ 11:11 PM BBT Cams 1/2
September 5, 2011 @ 11:18 PM BBT Cams 1/2
September 5, 2011 @ 11:23 PM BBT Cams 1/2
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Evel Dick is back in the fortune-spotlight at 11:08PM BBT.

In 2015, Evel Dick will start a Christmas tradition by bringing gifts to heavily-tattooed orphans, changing his name from Evel Dick to Old Saint Dick.

Dominic gets his fortune next at 11:11 PM BBT.

In 2013, Dominic will grace the cover of Seventeen magazine with the headline “Total Dom-ination.” He’ll dethrone pop-sensation, Justin Bieber as America’s favorite heartthrob.

The Fortune Teller has one for Keith next at 11:18 PM BBT.

In 2015, Keith will land a job hosting a new dating show called “Love Rejection.” But it will be short-lived after it’s revealed he tried to date all 29 female contestants.

Jordan gets her own fortune next at 11:23PM BBT thanks to the Humilitard.

In 2011 after the runaway success of the Humilitard, Jordan will launch a line of Humilitard-inspired items including the Humilicar, the Humilifier, and then Humilibake oven.

After this the Fortune Teller begins repeating previous fortunes. At 2:11AM BBT, Cassie’s Riverwatch fortune is retold. Rachel does not make it in time to hear it. Rachel’s fortune is repeated at 2:32AM BBT. Rachel sleeps through this one as well. Keith’s fortune is retold at 2:49AM BBT. Still no Rachel. Porsche’s igloo fortune is retold at 3:51AM BBT.

The fortune repeats continue through the early morning. At 4:57AM BBT Lawon’s fashion line prediction is retold. Then at 5:14 AM the Donato reconciliation fortune is retold. Crystal repeats Kalia’s prediction at 5:41 AM BBT. Brendon’s is the last to be repeated at 5:52AM BBT.

The HGs hope they’ve heard the last from Crystal the fortune teller. She might not be done yet though so keep your Live Feeds running as Crystal keeps the HGs on their toes.

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