Well, seeing that everything that has happened the last few days of Big Brother 16 is all pointless – since Julie will come on the screen tomorrow night and say – “Lets do it all over again” thanks to the Big Brother Rewind I think doing player rankings this week is pointless as well. So – I will mix it up and give out Bacon to the first 5 evictees and recap their games (or in some cases lack there of).

Big Brother HG - Adam Poch

Big Brother HG Adam Poch – Credit: Greg P Photo

Joey – 5 strips of BACON – wait, what? Joey was the first person voted out and I am giving her the most bacon possible?? Yes – she was right from the start. She knew that the boys were all starting to get together early on and wanted to do something about it. Sadly in the Big Brother house – what you say does not always matter, how you say it does. She was a free spirit and let her mouth get her in trouble – but that does not change the fact that she was right and every girl on the way out the door must have thought to themselves – why didn’t we listen to Joey?

She will be remembered as the first person in Team America – but never had a chance to do anything to win the $. I feel like the producers should have had Team America in place right from the get go – instead of waiting a couple of weeks to add people to it. This could have given her a chance to stay the first week – and who knows how many other characters she would have come up with. OK, maybe 5 strips of Bacon is too much for her – but she was a player I would have loved to see more of.

Paola – 1 strip of Bacon – Paola was one of my preseason picks – because she is a NYC girl – but the the twist this season made her the easy nominee the 2 weeks she was in the house. As someone who did not know much about the show before getting casted – she will be remembered not so much for her gameplay as she will for epic speeches & fashion poses. Watching her friendship with Donny blossom was sweet – but she should have spent some more time trying to get to know the others as well.

If not for wishy washy Devin – chances are she could have been the Victoria of the season… instead she got to go home early and continue her DJ career. Since she is also a HUGE fan of bacon, giving her only 1 strip of “virtual bacon” is ok – cause I am sure we will dine on swine all over NYC in real life!

Devin – 4 strips of Bacon – every season we have a player who tries to win the game week 1 – this season it was Devin. #DevinHasADaughter was one of the best things trending this season on twitter. He thought he had the whole game figured out the first week – and played very reckless. He was so fun to watch because you never knew when he would have another house meeting, bring someone new into his alliance, or just have a catastrophic meltdown.

Both in life & in the Big Brother house – its always good to come up with a plan, and stick to it, until it does not work. He changed his plans every minute to the point where he even saved Brittany his number one target. He was missed on the feeds & CBS show as soon as he walked out the door, Had he stayed, who knows how many more fun moments we would have gotten from him. I am glad to see he has a sense of humor about it in the “real” world.

Brittany – 3 strips of Bacon – isn’t it ironic that the “soccer mom” of the season had to kick a soccer ball 50,000 times? Poor Brittany tore up her feet trying to prove to the rest of the house that she was a competitor and it may have also been the final nail in her coffin. She used her power of persuasion 2 weeks before to get Devin to save her – but that was the only smart game move she made.

She did keep the house clean, and after she left it turned into a pig sty. For that reason alone, I wish she stayed in the house. But alas she gave us the most heartfelt moment of the season when her kids came out on stage after she was evicted. Everyone that played the game before gave up time with their families – and other than Libra from season 10 who had 4 month old twins at home – Brittany probably had the hardest time away from her family. I gave her 3 strips of bacon to give one to each of her children.

Amber – 2 strips of Bacon – Amber will be most remembered as the “victim” of Caleb’s Stalkmance this summer. She never really was able to shake him off and for that, the rest of the guys used him to get rid of her. Even though she was brought into the Bomb Squad early on – she did not want to be there and was trying to do some sneaking around which also got her into some hot water.

She was a competition beast, winning 1 HoH & 2 BotBs – and could have been a great ally in the house for people. Amber was also semi-responsible for one of the best moments of the season, when she basically single handed won the Knight Moves BotB and Jocasta started talking in tongues. I would have loved ot see her stick around, fake a showmance with Caleb – and then be the one that sent him packing.

Looking back on the 5 people that left, it’s probably better they all left when they did, because the longer you stay in the house – the nastier it gets. All 5 of them seem to have better lives outside the house than inside. Yes, $500,000 would help anyone, but the sacrifice and torture (from the stress and the fans) – could have hurt them long-term.

It’s no coincidence in a season of Safe Moves, that all 5 of these people above were recruits – and did not know much about the game before playing it. All 5 did bring us some entertainment, and that’s why no Tofu was awarded!

So – there ya have it. How many strips of bacon would you have given the first 5??

Also – this week, I will be in Arkansas for the Bacon Bowl with Spencer from BB15 – come join us 9/13 in Bentonville – www.baconbowl.net

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